As you know if you have been reading this blog for a while, this space is all about inclusion and acceptance. It's about oneness and equality. It's about love and freedom.
Fat people, tall people, short people, small people. All genders, all nationalities and all colors.
Oneness to me is not political, it's humanitarian.
The internet was in a tizzy yesterday as Adele posted a picture of herself on Instagram. In her picture, it was clear that she has lost a lot of weight. Her face isn't really clear, but if you showed me the picture without knowing who it was, I would never have recognized her.
It was also international no-diet day yesterday, and I thought I would end up writing a scathing post about how awful dieting is (which is true) but there are several other factors beneath the surface in a story like this that I wanted to talk about, like the fact that I actually don't know what is going on with her body any more than anyone else does.
Read MoreLast week I talked about weight gain during the quarantine since many people are worried about that (thanks to diet culture and diet mentality and our social conditioning). This week I'd like to talk about what else could happen.
It's just as possible that people will lose weight during the quarantine.
Or people may stay the same.
Disruption of routines can affect people in a wide variety of ways.
Read MoreI’d like to talk about a few things that I know people are worried about during the quarantine.
The first is people being worried about gaining weight during quarantine and the second is related and the other side of the coin - the idea of eating "healthy" during the quarantine.
Ok - so let's dive in.
Read MoreSo today is going to be really fun. I'm sharing all kinds of resources from the world of energy medicine, energy healing, mind/body healing and spirituality. If this does not appeal to you - no worries!
I love this realm because it is full of possibilities. As a recovered chronic dieter and people pleaser, I spent most of my life trying to find the "right" answers and do the "right" thing.
I love the world of the spirit because it reminds us that there is no such thing and that "right" is different for every person. It also reminds us to go within to find out what that is. It asks us to question, "What Else is Possible?"
.....a message of love and hope.
So I don't know about you, but I spent the weekend in a bit of a fear spiral. I knew it was happening but I was drawn to CNN like butter to a potato.
It wasn't an all-out panic but it was enough to remind me that it doesn't help and it doesn't feel good and it's actually not necessary.
I know it sure feels necessary right now but one of the real challenges is not letting that voice and that energy suck you in.
I am feeling compelled to reach out and check-in. How is everyone doing with all the world's craziness right now?
It's all pretty weird and I've noticed a few interesting things.
One thing I noticed is the irony when it comes to food and bodies with the Coronavirus pandemic.
I'm feeling inspired today to share what I believe. That way, you'll know if you are in the right place and if you want to subscribe to my newsletter and receive weekly(ish) support and inspiration on your path to food peace.
It's hard to capture everything, so this list will be incomplete.
This list will also change often because we are always changing. Change is about the only thing we can count on.
Hi all! I'm popping in today to share a few tools that I have been using lately in my self-acceptance practice.
Cognitively, it was really easy for me to grasp the importance of self-acceptance and the benefit I'd receive from reducing the negative thoughts that I had for myself and my body.
But it has been more of a challenge to release the fears I had embedded in my body, about my body, and to practice my new beliefs in real life.
Read MoreAnd now for a reader question!
JB says that she let go of dieting for 18 months and her weight stabilized. She didn't have a bottomless hunger anymore and was feeling better but…..
"I recently got married and now I've put on a bit of weight, I feel more drawn to sweet things again and am hungrier like at the start. I know that the key to all this is acceptance rather than liking it but I have a whole new set of clothes that aren't going to fit me again if I keep going and why now!
Read MoreAmong other things, I'm a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. My clients come to me because they want to learn Intuitive Eating. However, I'm also a Certified Professional Life Coach and what I also really want to share is that if you go straight to Intuitive Eating (IE) in order to heal your relationship with food, it's like "putting a vitamin in your poop" (a great phrase I heard from Melody Fletcher the other day.
Diet and exercise, in order to change your body and make you happy, is also like putting a vitamin in your poop.
What you are eating and how you are moving, whether it's intuitive or restrictive, are the behaviors you have, which means they are the last step in the process when we make choices.
Read MoreI'm headed to the Dr. today. I have been having some pain and numbness in my arm that is causing me to lose sleep. Frankly, I think it's "Holidayitis" - it happens every year in some form or another. I actually know what I need to do - rest, relax, let go of some shit and have some holiday fun.
But this blog isn't about my aches and pains. This blog is an effort to inform and educate those in the medical profession who might need to change how they do business in 2020. This change has been needed for decades and I'm hoping it will start to sink in soon.
This blog is about health forms and the impact they have and how we can make sure they are having the impact that is most effective and intended.
Read MoreThis morning I thought of a great analogy between a popular book and working on your relationship with food and body. I'll probably look back and realize I said something similar a year ago but that in itself brings up another good point.
During this work, we will often revisit the same issues, concepts, and feelings that we may have already addressed in the past. It doesn't mean you are taking a step backward, you can never take a step backward.
It's not uncommon that what is coming up for my clients is coming up for me and coming up for many people in my world who I am having conversations with.
I know this isn't an accident because we are all connected.
What I am noticing right now is the tendency we have to ignore how we are feeling about something, consciously or unconsciously, and then blame something, totally unrelated, for how we feel.
Read MoreCongratulations! That is so exciting that you have chosen to leave diet culture behind and repair your relationship with food and body. Bravo to you. This work takes courage and strength.
To help you on your way, I wrote this post to give you some support as you head into the holiday season.
If it's the first time you are seeing family and friends since you gave up dieting, it can be intimidating and uncomfortable, it can also be incredibly freeing and exhilarating.
Here are a few things you can do to navigate those first few holidays.
Read MoreDid you grow up despising or disliking your body? Did your parents like their bodies? Have you spent years and perhaps decades (like me) trying to change your body? How do we make sure we do not pass our harmful limiting beliefs and attitudes on to our children?
Or if thinking about your body negatively has never occurred to you, but it seems to be happening to your child, what can you do?
Read MoreThis fall has been one of transition. I have a new office, my kids are back to school and my oldest has gone off to college for the first time (Go Huskies!).
As usual, I have been monitoring how I feel during this time and noting what feels good and what doesn't feel so good so I can figure out the most nourishing ways to support myself.
I compiled a list of some of the things that make me feel good and help me stay grounded and centered even during a time of change and not knowing exactly what is going to come next.
Journaling: I do this every day. It's the first thing I do with a cup of coffee, before checking any email or social media. It helps me make sense of what is happening and get clear on what I want. I've been doing this for decades because I look forward to it.
Feeling: When I felt sad about the college transition, I sat with it and I felt sad. I let it flow through. I gave myself some space.
Music: When in doubt, throw on a new playlist! Some of my favorites this summer have been; Maggie Rogers, Juke Ross, Sleeping at Last and Jukebox the Ghost. I make playlists that make me want to move and playlists to calm and soothe when I am feeling anxious.
Sound healing: Youtube has tons of sound healing options. Our bodies are made out of energy and they respond to sound. (That's why we love music so much.) I listen to this and this when I can't fall asleep or I wake up in the middle of the night.
Walking outside, getting sun on my face or even just standing in the grass if I'm too tired for a walk. "Grounding" is literally something our bodies do when they are in contact with the ground. (Mom, that's why you always love being barefoot!) Whether it helps or not, it sure can't hurt.
Laughter: We've been watching The Good Place on Netflix. So funny. Also, we enjoy being "that" parent and embarrassing our teenagers. It's highly entertaining.
Food: I've been loving the start of cold weather foods from chili to broccoli soup. I also love a bowl of Hood's Green Monster Mint ice cream while watching tv at night. Yum.
Movement: Walking has been a favorite this fall and energy medicine yoga which combines the principles of energy medicine with a yoga routine. I love killing two birds with one stone. (Wait, what? Why is that even a saying?)
Sleep: I love 20-minute naps!
New classes: I find nothing breaks me out of a funk like a new class, I guess I'm just an academic at heart. So I'm diving into several self-study classes this fall like the Coaches Rising class on The Neuroscience of Change. Fascinating!
Support: I get my own coaching, mentoring and supervision often. We all have our blind spots and places we'd like to be stronger.
Connection to others: I try to have a coffee date or phone call at least once a week with a friend, or new colleague or someone I want to get to know better.
Breathing! It seems so simple, but it's so incredible what breathing does for our bodies. Focused and deliberate deep breathing. There is also the breath of fire, nostril breathing and simply putting your hand on your heart for 10 deep belly breaths. I'd like to make this a more regular part of my day but when I am feeling tense - it's my go to. You can do it anywhere.
Heartmath: - this is a combination of breathing and centering techniques with a focus on gratitude and channeling the feeling of love and sending it out into the world. It has science and evidence to back up its benefits and is a great tool for decreasing anxiety.
Connection to something bigger than me: In addition to learning about energy medicine and using meditation and deep breathing, I love to notice and be grateful for all the ways I am guided and supported in this life. This book is one of my favorites on that topic.
Pet snuggles: And when all else fails, lying on the floor and spooning with our Bernese Mountain Dog, Sammie, never fails to comfort.
So those are all my secrets! Relying on these tools has helped me stay present and enabled me to take care of myself during what is typically a stressful time.
This also keeps me from turning to dieting to feel a sense of control or focusing on my body as a problem when feeling stressed. There is no right or wrong way to take care of ourselves especially if we are coming from a place of loving care and curiosity.
What tools do you rely on in stressful times?
I have a request for health coaches. I think it's a fair and simple request.
When you post the before and after pictures of the clients who have used your diet product or service, could you make the small print at the bottom of your post a little bigger to read?
I'm getting older and my eyes aren't what they are used to be. So it's kind of hard to see that the average weight loss of those who use your product is only X and that people using your product are only tracked for 12 weeks while using your product.
Read MoreThere are many people in the world who want to lose weight. Before stepping on that path for the first time or the 30th time, here are a few things to consider.
First, what is your goal and why?
For example, in my 30's I had a goal weight in mind. It was a weight I had achieved for a few years between college and marriage when I was living on my own, working and had very few responsibilities. Fast forward to age 36 and 3 babies later and I was still trying to weigh that. And because I didn't weigh that - I automatically judged my body as being unacceptable without actually considering how it felt to be in my body or how my body functioned. So what is your goal? When did you set that as the goal? Who and what influenced your decision? Why do you think it's something you need to do?
Read MoreDear James ,
I absolutely loved your response to Bill Maher about fat shaming. You are right on that fat shaming is just a form of bullying and it will do nothing to make people smaller. Bravo.
In fact, fat shaming and weight bias has been shown to actually have a negative effect on health that is worse than whatever weight a person may be carrying on their body.
However, I did want to mention a few things that you may want to consider in addition to the great points you already made in your rebuttal.
Read MoreLive Free or Diet Coaching website helping women stop dieting and learn intuitive eating and practice self compassion and self acceptance. Practicing Health at Every Size and promoting weight neutrality.
Here are a few of my most popular blog posts:
Dear Family Members During the Holidays
The Problem with Body Positivity: A Rebuttal
The Game of Life on a Diet
I Still Have Fat on my Body
So the Dr. Said You Need to Lose Weight
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